New Beginnings

I know it's been awhile...a lot has changed, mostly for the good, some for the bad. I know you were there the day Amanda and I got married. We heard the bird chirping from the time we arrived to the time we left. Everyone knew that it was a sign from God that you were there in spirit...

That was two years ago, and now we're expecting a little girl of our own. I often wonder what advice you would give me to get ready for her. I know you and mom tried for many years before you had me, which makes me feel blessed to get this opportunity so early in life. I just want to raise her like you raised me, Candi, and Jamie. You always showed us your love and we knew that even when you were disappointed in us, you still loved us no matter what.

The one thing I keep coming back to is how soon you left us. I know you had no say in when it was time to go so I don't blame you...it still hurts though. It's given me the inspiration though to make sure I do whatever I can to make sure I'm healthy enough that, if it's up to me, I can stay here and watch my little girl grow up, get married, and have kids of her own. I want to be here for all of that and so much more...

If things happen the way I think they do, then you've probably already met your granddaughter before it was time for her to come to this world. I may be wrong, but I'd like to believe that's true and that a little part of you will live on in her. I wish you could be here to see her when she arrives...I wish you could be here to help mom through her illness and all the trouble she's having...I wish you could be here to help me, because Lord knows I need the help...

I'll just keep relying on the lessons you taught me when you were here...the lessons in the Bible you taught me to read and depend on...and the advice that mom gives me while she's here. I love you, Dad...and I can't wait to see you again.